Thursday, April 24, 2008

Muh ki baat chin li !

Article: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/2975525.cms
(Author is a BJP MP, National Secretary and convenor of the party's think tank)
The importance of being a Gandhi-Nehru
Two recent developments – repeated references to Rahul Gandhi as “Yuvraj” (the heir to the throne) by a Congress MP in the Rajya Sabha and an innocuous recent press advertisement – have underlined the malice of dynastic politics that continues to plague the Congress, India’s oldest political party.
Last Monday, Dr E. M. Sudarsana Natchipan was participating in a discussion on the Rural Development Ministry in Rajya Sabha. In the true tradition of his party, he reduced the entire issue of rural development to singing paeans of Rahul Gandhi. Calling Rahul a “Yuvraj” a number of times in his discourse, he compared him to Lord Buddha. Dr Natchipan conveniently forgot that in a democracy, there is no “Yuvraj” or “Yuvrani”. And if there is a “Yuvraj”, logically there will be a “Rajmata” as well. And who is the “Rajmata”? No prizes for guessing.
In another development, several newspapers recently carried an advertisement from the government mouthpiece Prasar Bharati. The advertisement says that the Prasar Bharati will "soon be coming out with a comprehensive website on the great leaders of India". It has sought audio-video material on these great leaders from those who may be having such material in their possession. The public has been asked to send these to the Doordarshan archives.
The advertisement also carries the photographs of these "great leaders of India" – Mahatma Gandhi, Jawaharlal Nehru, Indira Gandhi and Rajiv Gandhi. Now, I have no quarrel that the first three contributed to the greatness of pre-independence and post-independence India. Most historians would have reservations about Rajiv Gandhi being included in this list. But even that could be ignored.
However, can we ignore the underlying insult to this great country by a government body’s decision to recognise only these four people as "great leaders"? What about Subhash Chandra Bose? Or Bhagat Singh? Or Rajaji? Dr Rajendra Prasad? Veer Savarkar? Dr. K B Hedgewar? Lal Bahadur Shastri, under whose leadership India was able to recover its prestige in 1965 after Nehru's disastrous policy allowed China to slap India across the face? Is he not among the "great leaders of India?" Or is it that this tiny man with no aristocratic blood to flaunt or Cambridge degree to distinguish him has no place among the "great" of post-independence India?
What about Jayaprakash Narayan whose tremendous power of moral force toppled a dictatorship in 1977 even though he and his followers were jailed for 19 months? Is Rajiv Gandhi who came to power on the strength of his family connection — without having to sacrifice anything — greater than JP, a hero of not only 1975-77 but also of the 1942 movement, the entire independence struggle and the Bhoodan movement? Rajiv Gandhi came to power on a sympathy wave but his massive two-thirds majority could not help him avoid an electoral defeat five years later.
This insult to India is carrying on unchecked because we have "leaders" who do not have the guts to tell the “royals” the truth. Emasculated by years of slavish underdog-ism, these leaders not only genuflect but also cower and crawl before the party's royal family. One angry look from 10 Janpath is enough to send these "leaders" to Tirupati to beg the Lord of the Seven Hills to spare them from this royal rage.
In that respect, I would any day give the thumbs up to Uttar Pradesh Chief Minister Mayawati. At least she has the guts to take on the “prince”.
Coming back to the advertisement, Prasar Bharti is not to be blamed in the prevailing environment of sycophancy. Enough care has been taken to stamp out all other great names that participated in the freedom struggle and afterwards lent their shoulder to shepherd the country through tough times. For instance, behind the seat of the Prime Minister in the Lok Sabha there is a list of his predecessors. When Rajiv Gandhi was Prime Minister, it fell to the Opposition to raise a howl over Shastri's omission from this list. This could not have been a simple mistake because the Lok Sabha records cannot be trifled with and any writing therein is checked 20 times. The conclusion is obvious: no other name was to come up before the public except those belonging to the Nehru-Gandhi family.
Across the country, almost every government institution is named after members of only this family. Only in Kolkata has the local sentiment ensured that the airport is named after Netaji; the same has happened in Mumbai. But in Hyderabad, the new airport was not named after the tallest Andhra leader, N.T. Rama Rao or any other Telugu leader — one can think of many like T. Prakasam a fiery freedom fighter and a chief minister afterwards. Once again, it is Rajiv Gandhi’s name that has won out.
Such devotion to one family may please Congressmen but it is a national shame that this country of over 100 crore people with a civilization that is thousands of years old is being made to ignore its past and the string of great leaders it produced in every field. For instance, would it not have been more appropriate to name the government-funded culture and fine art centre coming up at Rajendra Prasad Road in Delhi after Rabindranath Tagore rather than Indira Gandhi? We can cite a number of other instances where Bharatiya men of eminence in arts, sciences, philosophy, etc have been ignored and the institution carries the name of one of the Congress' "royal family".
A nation whose top and middle level leaders are placed in the straitjacket of a single family loyalty is only damaging its own leadership mettle. This is like a mighty tree drawing on only one root and letting all other roots wither. Sometimes we are unhappy over Mayawati making a fetish of Dr Ambedkar and putting her own statues along with that of the architect of the Indian Constitution. But that counterweight is at least preferable to the refrain Congressmen have and are seeking to impose on the country. In 1975 we came across the slogan "One Country, One Leader, One Agenda" which was a precursor to the darkness that followed.
Before Dr Natchiappan declared Baba Rahul as the “Yuvraj” of independent India, another Congress stalwart Arjun Singh had referred to him as the next Prime Minister. But poor Arjun Singh. For telling the truth regarding the monarchy that rules his party he has been administered a public rebuke by the queen herself. The rebuke also conveys to the hoi polloi Congressmen that the royalty frowns upon commoners playing with the number one family. The question of succession and when it will be announced will be the privilege of the family alone.
But is that really so? Was Arjun Singh being prompted or did he slip up while trying to score brownie points over Prime Minister Dr Manmohan Singh? It is difficult to believe that a seasoned leader like Arjun Singh — former chief minister, governor, party vice-president and Nehru-Gandhi loyalist — would slip up especially as he has no need to demonstrate his loyalty. Also when a Congressman is asked by the media if he would like Rahul Gandhi to lead the government after the coming elections, can he dare say anything that could be interpreted as disguised disloyalty? The political calculations lead to the only explanation for the mystery of Arjun Singh being pulled up for stating the obvious: this is all a stage-managed affair to underline the importance of the royalty that rules the Congress.
It is a matter of pride for India to assert that India is not Indira (forgive poor Debkant Barooha) or the Gandhis but India is multi-faceted, with many streams, many names, rich beyond the reach of all the words in any language. It belongs to you as well as to me and all Indians have the right to aspire to be its Prime Minister and elected to that top spot.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Blooperon ka Baap !

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of keeping a straight face while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS : Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
____________ _________ _________ _______
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
____________ _________ _________ _______
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________ _________ _________ ______

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year- old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: ?
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was gettin' laid!
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you shitin' me? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess.
___________ _________ _________ _______
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to our attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _____
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?
____________ _________ _________ ________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Friday, April 04, 2008

Self Actualization revisited

Feeling of happiness or contentment is a vital facet of our existence. I find it to be extremely peculiar how people leave something that is so precious in the hands of those whose sole aim in life is to make others miserable.
I have heard an interesting saying –
‘Things that matter the most must never be left at the mercy of those who matter the least’.
Easier said than done. Our lives are so intricately connected to others that it is an insurmountable task to seek this level of alienation. Maybe the ups and down of life, like a rollercoaster, always travel along a pre decided path. Every journey an exhilaration that has a culmination. Then some one else gets on to experience the rush!